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DokBrowne [ 0.5 ]
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Seems that in the past decade or at least half of it, Tim Burton has started to become more of a brand name than a filmmaking artist with his own darkly comic fascinations. Just as one might joke that Scorsese's going to do another movie about gangsters or Ridley Scott will find yet another page of ancient history to transform into a gritty war epic or Ron Howard will make his 80th triumphant populist snoozefest out of another trivial true story of 20th century heroism, one might also easily suggest for the purposes of mockery that Tim Burton's gonna direct a twisted "Willy Wonka" remake or the dark "Alice in Wonderland" tale that so far has only existed in literature and video games. But to actually see him go through with these projects is depressing.
"Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" was barely tolerable, but now I've reached a personal limit with "Alice". Forget the 3D, I saw it on DVD, so I won't hold that probably atrocious aspect against the film itself. It's just awful, in every way. The art direction that is obviously the main attraction for most viewers looks hideously half-baked and awkward. There's some imagery that catches your eye, but it usually doesn't fit with other CG effects in the same shot, and it's hard to stay awake or sane anyway with the script that is alternately boringly faithful to past versions (the droll caterpillar, the foods that pointlessly alter her size) and even more boringly tries to stake out new storytelling territory by grafting on a bafflingly earnest war climax (in a surrealist fantasy realm?) and the 500 billionth tale ever told about someone expressing their independence.
Out of context, Johnny Depp's makeup and his Irish accent are suitably bizarre, but he in fact is one of the worst things about the movie. So infatuated with his on-screen alter ego is Burton that he contorts the whole narrative to focus on the Mad Hatter's bravery and prominence in Alice's quest, an incredibly vain contrivance to shoehorn in Depp that provides nothing for the movie and just shows off how annoying Depp can be when he has a really weak part to play. His jig at the end is one of the most obnoxious things I've ever seen.
Seriously, Burton needs to return to his roots, or scout out better writers, or have a judge issue a restraining order between him and Johnny Depp, or do an independent movie or something, but please stop with these big dark-fantasy spectacles, because they're getting really embarrassing
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| Weighted Rating | : 5.1 |
| No. Ratings | : 3 | |
| No. Reviews | : 3 | |
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