Now it's time for me to pillage yet another user's article idea, this time within 24 hours of its existence! I'm getting pretty efficient at this. This time it's kcremer's list of comedians and their success according to him. Pretty creative - if you have any more lists or ideas, don't hesitate to post them. However, as a distinct human being with my own set of opinions and all that wackiness, I have a few disagreements about your ratings, so I'll offer my own. I'll also contend that Jennifer Lopez, Kate Hudson, Drew Barrymore, Gary Busey, and Matthew Lillard don't really belong on the list, since they're not true comedians (Lopez and Hudson only do the occasional comedy and always play more or less sincere, un-humorous characters; Barrymore plays the sweetheart; Busey is affiliated with comedy only now because of that horrible, I'll-do-anything-to-preserve-my-career reality show on Comedy Central; and Lillard, for better or worse (better!) is an authentic actor who's just often goofy). I can accept Jack Nicholson and Robert De Niro, though, since they've done enough comedy throughout their careers to qualify. On with the show:
5 = Extremely Funny
4 = Pretty Funny
3 = Can Be Funny Sometimes, Maybe Annoying Others
2 = Rarely Funny/*Or Was Once Funny, But Not Now
1 = May Have Made Me Laugh Once In Their Life
0 = Never Funny, Ever
Conan O'Brien - 5
Jack Black - 5
Jerry Seineld - 5
Dave Chappelle - 5
Bill Murray - 5
Steve Buscemi - 5
Christopher Walken - 5
Seann William Scott - 5
Ben Stiller - 5
Adam Carolla - 5
Owen Wilson - 5
David Spade - 5
Jim Carrey - 5
Will Ferrell - 4.5
Norm MacDonald - 4
Sarah Silverman - 4 (underrated)
John Lithgow - 4
Billy Crystal - 4
Denis Leary - 4
John Goodman - 4 (he deserves a 10 just for "The Big Lebowski")
Jay Mohr - 4
Rodney Dangerfield - 4
Eugene Levy - 4
Jamie Kennedy - 4
Will Smith - 3
Bob Saget - 3 (I'll admit: the main reason I like him is because I was an avid watcher of "Full House" and thought he was one of the few appealing family membes, not because of his ribald stand-up)
Howard Stern - 3 (more interesting personality than funnyman)
Chris Rock - 3
Bernie Mac - 3
Lisa Kudrow - 3
Catherine O'Hara - 3
Jack Nicholson - 3
Jim Breuer - 3 (also underrated)
Andy Dick - 3 (5 for "Newsradio", 1 for being so hyper and grotesque)
Tracy Morgan - 3 (it's all in his delivery)
Jimmy Fallon - 3 (often too in love with himself, though)
Ellen DeGeneres - 3
Chris Kattan - 3
Eddie Murphy - 3
Danny DeVito - 3 (more lovable than funny)
Tom Green - 3 (4 for "Road Trip" and "Charlie's Angels", 0 for his MTV show and "Freddy Got Fingered")
Robin Williams - 2*
Randy Quaid - 2* (had his moments, but has sucked fiercely since the mid-'90s)
Adam Sandler - 2* (I loved his albums, but with the exception of "Happy Gilmore", he's always been the unfunniest person in his movies)
Jamie Foxx - 2* (*was great on "In Living Color" but hasn't been since)
Steve Zahn - 2* (not anymore)
Tom Arnold - 2* (it's all about "True Lies")
Whoopi Goldberg - 2* (she was incredible in "Jumpin' Jack Flash" and did okay during the height of her career, but hasn't made me laugh for over a decade, and her Oscar hostessings were an atrocity)
Dan Aykroyd - 2*
Chevy Chase - 2* (but he was never that funny)
Martin Lawrence - 2 (has been funny, but the ratio is like 8:1)
Robert De Niro - 2
Molly Shannon - 2
Martin Short - 2
Rob Schneider - 2
Jay Leno - 2
David Letterman - 2
Woody Harrelson - 2
Ashton Kutcher - 2
John Leguizamo - 2
Ana Gasteyer - 2
Chris Tucker - 2
Nathan Lane - 2
Ray Romano - 1
Rosie O'Donnell - 1
Drew Carey - 1
George Carlin - 1
John Turturro - 1
Craig Kilborn - 1
Bill Cosby - 0
Caroline Rhea - 0
Roseanne - 0
Kathy Griffin - 0
Jimmy Kimmel - 0
And people you forgot:
Phil Hartman - 10, the funniest person ever, imo
Patrick Warburton - 5
Dave Foley - 5
Gene Wilder - 5
Kevin Kline - 5
Chris Farley - 4.5
Fred Willard - 4
Mike Myers - 4
John Cleese - 4
Steve Martin - 4
Michael Ian Black - 4
Janeane Garofalo - 4
Matthew Perry - 3
Jon Lovitz - 3
Tim Allen - 2
Rowan Atkinson - 2
Margaret Cho - negative points
We could go back even further to include Chaplin, Keaton, the Marx Bros., Peter Sellers, Bob Hope, et al, but I don't wanna go overboard
And I don't really know who Jeff Ross is, other than a familiar name. Sorry.
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